It’s as if we’ve taken the Law of Attraction to be another kind of All Knowing, Judging God. Only now the sin is any emotion outside the realm of Pollyanna thinking and over-stretching optimism. While I certainly feel that joy is our most natural state, bypassing pain is not the way to get there. Remember the age-old adage: “what you resist persists.” Yet it seems after all we’ve learned through understanding how the Universe works, the message we have bought into is this: Ignore pain. Ignore suffering. Just be happy.
I noticed this heavily after the shooting in Sandy Hook Elementary. My normally very vocal and active spiritual community online was surprisingly silent. Only a few people (I noticed) said anything at all. The same people who make an online ruckus over a moon cycles and how important love is, were barely able to give a nod to the atrocity of the events on Friday.
I even noticed this struggle in my own heart. My first response was “turn it off. Don’t give it any energy.” It was as if we are afraid that to look at the suffering of those in Connecticut, because to look at it means we are choosing it to be our reality.
The concept of “we are all one” seems to go out the window when those aspects of us that are in incredible pain take a more public platform. It’s like we all wanted to pretend that that atrocity was caused by someone else’s low vibration, not ours, and to acknowledge it at all is to give it a presence in our lives that may perhaps reveal our own shadows. Or perhaps it makes us look “unspiritual,” because, after all, the truly enlightened have no emotional reaction to anything because they “know” the higher reality. Right?
This is why I disagree:
You can never truly heal if you don’t go THROUGH the emotion – bypassing is not healing. And healing is not the same as ignoring. Choosing to focus on sending love to those who are suffering is not the same as focusing on the atrocity.
Focusing on pain or tragedy seems to strike fear in the heart of many light workers, dreading that “terrible” event of a “lowered vibration.” And to be fair, it is certainly easy to get pulled into the drama of tragic events if we’re not careful to stay present to our hearts while facing the pain.
But it is possible to face pain and hold a space of love while keeping your vibration high. It’s called transmutation. And it the foundation of all healing. In fact, it’s the foundation of our light-work, is it not?
True healing is not bypassing the pain, it’s going right into it with love and compassion. This step can’t be skipped. It’s impossible to heal without it.
Holding a space of love for the suffering of others and our own “shadows,” is not the same as ignoring suffering all together. Like it or not, pain DOES still exist in this world. There is still a shadow…and that shadow will grow bigger if it is not faced in love, validated, and healed.
If life has taught me anything, it is that ignoring a problem does not make it go away. Grief is necessary for true healing. In fact, grief can be a truly liberating and freeing emotion.
After my mom died, I didn’t grieve for years – I just simply didn’t know how. But pretending I was okay didn’t work. No matter how hard I tried to be happy, somewhere deep inside me desperately ached, and by not giving that pain validation, it grew.
We are all called to walk that delicate line between acceptance/surrender and resistance/despair. Bypassing the work of healing all together is the root of suffering . If we refuse to face our shadow, it will find a way to get our attention – and the more we ignore it, the bigger it gets.
Just look at the man who instigated the shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary – he was clearly suffering from unhealed aspects of his own shadow. And I’ll be bold enough to say that by ignoring the suffering of these people (who are other aspects of ourselves), we are perpetuating the same problem that caused these deaths to begin with.
What happened in Connecticut is not a reflection of somebody else “out there”; it’s a reflection of ALL OF US, because we are not separate from these people. Whether we choose to look at it or not, the suffering of the families in Connecticut (and around the world) affect us. It is our suffering. And these sufferings will continue to affect us until we embrace true healing. If someone else is hurting, we all are hurting. There is no way around it.
It strikes me as odd that the very people claiming love is the only answer, are unsure of what to do when people are in need of it. By choosing to ignore the pain and suffering of those in Connecticut, we are choosing to ignore our own shadow.
And I don’t just mean the “victims’’” pain, but also the man who inflicted it. Yes, he too is a reflection of all of us, and we have to face this. Hating him will not heal anyone, anymore than ignoring him will make him go away.
It’s time to come to terms with who and what we truly are. We must embrace all aspects of ourselves. We are not in this alone. We are not separate from those people suffering in Connecticut or Darfur or Iraq. It may seem far removed from us, but it’s still there, and it is desperate for validation, love, and healing.
I cannot speak for the majority of light workers, this is just what I experienced on Friday: near silence, a few nods of acknowledgement, and several philosophical, New Age babble about how it is all meant to be – how these kids created their reality and in some “higher perspective” out there it’s all good. And that’s all fine and well, but the fact of the matter still exist: these people are hurting. Like it or not, that is our global reality.
I know all of my fellow light workers are powerful healers, with deep empathic abilities and loving intentions for the transformation of this world. So where was the love on Friday? Why aren’t we bonding together to meditate and send healing to these people? I’m still trying to figure that one out.
I once posted a blog on Chakra Center about hugging trees and to-date it’s had more views, feedback and shares than any other article I’ve posted on this site, even more than my call out for a meditation of love for the people in the Sandy Hook Elementary school tragedy.
Light workers! What’s with the silence? It is in times like these when your love and powerful abilities are needed most. It is in deep suffering that people need to know they are not alone. In order for pain to heal, it must first be validated, then we must do our best to surround them with the love within us.
We should never let a problem to be solved, a fear of “low vibration,” or any “New Age” belief become more important than a person to be loved.
Just something to think about.