5 Health Tips for Empaths and HSP

Empaths

Because my emotions/sensitivities affect everything about how I live, the decisions I make, what I will and won’t do, and how well I do my work, I’ve learned (the hard way) that if I don’t take care of my energy moment-moment-, day-by-day, I create a sort of etheric straight jacket around myself that renders me pretty useless.

When I first started learning/researching things that could help me as an empath, I noticed a common theme: hide and “protect” — defensive strategies galore. But with my job, I HAD to be around people, so I needed to learn not just how to put a bubble of protection around me, but how to line-up with the best energetic version of myself and those people as possible.

Many empaths think “shielding” and boundaries are their only forms of power, but that “solution “carries within it the very vibration of “the problem” (“I pick up negative energy that I need protection from” – is implied). But when we do this, we forget the most important part of the equation of this vibrational reality: YOU CAN’T PICK UP WHAT YOU’RE NOT A MATCH TO! So shouldn’t the solution for ANY empath involve raising your own energy so as not to be a match to low vibrations?!

If you stay in a disempowered, fearful vibration, you will be a match to people taking advantage of you and wanting to suck your energy. But if you do the work to keep your own energy clean (in the form of shadow work, emotional healing, physical exercise, healthy food) you can use your powerful sensitivities to attract incredible experiences into your life. Truly stepping into your power an empath is learning to open your sensitivities wide– to their most subtle perception, to breathe in the world around you – to experience what it’s like to live as a sensitive/empathic being that is deeply engaged and in love with the world – empowered and in energetic mastery. You get to come out of hiding and LIVE.

If you believe your sensitivities make you vulnerable and weak, you will emit that energy signal out to others. Therefore, one of the first health tips for ANY empath is to start seeing (and believing) how your sensitivity is a strength, how it can benefit you and make your life more enjoyable, how your sensitivities can help you enjoy life more, and when you tune-in and use them, how it can help you consciously manifest the energy you want to play with.

We are NOT powerless and there is SO MUCH MORE IN OUR CONTROL than most empaths ever allow themselves to realize.

Here are my tips for daily energetic hygiene, to keep empathic sensitivities keen, sharp, and working FOR you (rather than against you):

1. Tune-in to your energy regularly: Anyone who has taken my classes or read any past articles know I harp on this more than anything else. If you don’t know HOW you are feeling, you can’t move in a direction that is balanced/healthy/soothing. Many empaths have trained themselves to tune their feelings out (so as not to be overwhelmed by them) but this actually works against us in more than one way. Remaining ignorant of our own emotions causes us to overcommit and burn-out, ending-up in situations that drains our energy further (from lack of attention to what our energy bodies are actually capable of), or, on the flip side – causes agoraphobic tendencies, further weakening and suppression of our stronger, more masculine energy (which is what guards and protects our feminine, receptive sensitivities – I’m not talking about gender here folks – just energy we ALL have). Ask yourself every morning when you wake-up (and throughout the day whenever you think of it) “What do I feel? What do I need? AND “What would somebody who loves themselves do?”

These three questions can change your life.

2. Drink lots of water: When we are highly sensitive to energy, our physical bodies are the first to take the brunt of energetic excess and auric clutter. One of the most important things we can do for ourselves is to TAKE CARE OF OUR BODIES, and drinking water is the simplest place to start. I like to prepare a jar of water infused with organic cucumbers, basil, and berries, and drink a full glass every hour. If you have to, set a reminder on your phone so you don’t forget. When you do this, you ensure that your body is not only hydrated, but constantly flushing unwanted toxins/energy. It also forces you to draw attention to yourself/your body, which gives you another great opportunity to check-in “what do I need?”

3. Do regular energy cleanses: I like to imagine a white vortex of energy spinning around me, clearing and cleansing my aura. Visualization is power, and it helps to focus regularly on having our auric fields cleared, strengthened, and sparkly. Also, when you tune-in to your auric field, pay attention to how it feels. Being empathic means you are sensitive to subtle energy, and this can be used to your benefit when it comes to energetic health and attracting experiences. Pay close attention to how your auric field feels, and use the power of meditation/visualization to strengthen your magnetism, expand your energy outward (so you’re not contracting and drawing others energy in) and keeps your energy clean so you attract clean energy in return.

4. Strengthen your vibrational boarders by balancing alone time with socializing: A lot empaths feel they need to hide from the world, but if we spend too much time alone, this can cause emotional and energetic imbalances. It also fueles a powerful resistance of “outside” energies. What we resist, persists, as they say, and the solutions for being empowered as an empath is not to resist, but to overcome.

Use your alone time to really tune into your energy, feel what you need, and meet those needs (on the most subtle, energetic level). Then, before you go out, set intentions to expand and allow your positive energy to attract the same energy back to you. Imagine your energy field as powerful and expansive. As soon as you shrink within your “protection” bubble, you put out the “I’m weak” vibe – which is a perfect match for vampiric energy.

Exposing yourself to other people’s energy regularly (and intentionally) helps you practice expanding your energy out into the world, and learning what it feels like to attract powerful, uplifting experiences. If you are a constant match to energy vampires, remember that YOU are the one fueling that connection by not strengthening your vibrational boarders through RAISING your energy. Raising your energy provides an energetic barrier – like energy matches like energy: period. If your vibe is high, it is simply not a match to low energy. You don’t need a “bubble” of protection – you need STRONG POSITIVE, LOVING, EMPOWERED vibes. This can only come through EXPANDING OUT, not shrinking IN.

Obviously, pay attention to how you are feeling. If your energy is low and weak, build it up before you go out through connecting with nature, music, a salt bath and essential oils. Don’t pretend to feel strong when you don’t, but don’t use your empathic abilities as an excuse to hide from the world, either.

Make sense?

5. Use your words wisely: Begin saying affirmations out loud that uplift and empower you. Words are powerful, and I recommend using phrases that draw attention to your strength (not your weakness). So many empaths talk about themselves in incredibly disempowering terms (“I’m too sensitive. I can’t handle people’s energy. I can’t go out in groups. I feel everyone’s pain, etc.”). Feel what kind of an energetic signature those words put around you. Constantly voicing what you can’t handle fuels a strong victim vibration, which makes you, once again, a PERFECT match to energy vampires and predators. Sadly, the word ‘empath’ itself has nearly become synonymous with “victim.”

Does it feel empowering to talk about yourself like that? Start changing your vocabulary about your gift, Here are some examples:

*I am an energy Jedi Master

*I can sense the deeper, more subtle energetic vibrations of love, peace, and joy, making those emotions all the more easy to flow into my life

*I deeply feel and engage with all life forms

*I have emotional mastery

*I am a powerful magnet for love and loving people

*I attract positive people into my life

*I thrive in groups because I can tune-into and feel people’s joy and happiness, which further fuels my joy

*I am a powerful feeler, and this is a strength

Feel the difference?

I hope these tips remind you of the badass, peaceful warrior you are!

If you want to learn more about empowering your empathic abilities, check-out these online classes!

Happy Wednesday!

Don’t Be a Psychic Dildo: Advice for Empaths from Brandon Gilbert

Empaths

Last week I had a talk with herbalist, educator, and owner of Hyperion Herbs/Hyperion Academy, Brandon Gilbert.

In this two hour interview we discuss many of the issues empaths deal with, including:

*why people get sick or turn to addictions to numb out

*how we get energetically divided

*self-hatred

*getting used as a psychic dildo by others

*the role external/internal pathogens play in our energetic health

*the original self

*the acquired self

*eastern, holistic medicine

*western magick

*will vs. force

*Chinese herbs

*how to regain our freedom

*and more

We’ve only just scratched the surface with these topics, and I’m sure there will be more (in-depth) interviews to come.

Enjoy! And be sure to check Brandon out at the following links:

Hyperion Herbs

Hyperion Herbs Youtube Channel (where you’ll find a TON of potent information on tonic herbs, elixirs, and ancient wisdom).

13 Awesome Characteristics of Highly Sensitive People

Empaths

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted a guest blog, but since so many empaths (myself included) often forget the amazing, deeply present and FULL OF LIFE experience they get to have as highly sensitive people, I thought I’d share these reminders (from an incredibly inspiring blog called “The Rebelle Society“).

Here are 13 awesome characteristics of of highly sensitive people (and I’ve added my notes/thoughts about each one):

#1 Intuitive — highly sensitive people tend to be aware of what is happening below the surface, in between the lines and without an articulated reasoning.

My note: (this gives us a multi-dimensional/multi-colorful experience in any situation, and if we allow ourselves to use our intuition to learn, we often have rapid personal growth, too!)

#2 An ability to read the vibe — when entering a room, a conversation, a situation or when coming into contact with another person or group of people. Perhaps you can feel what type of mood or conversation was taking place just before you arrived, even if the people who were there are no longer present.

My note: (this allows us to be preemptive when we need to be, which can be a super power in-and-of itself)

#3 Picking up on the subtle — perhaps you’re able to respond to someone’s needs or questions before they even ask. Perhaps you can even tell when someone is lying to you o hiding something.

My note: (another useful superpower — this one can save you a lot unnecessary BS)

#4 Empathy for what others are feeling — and this goes beyond just the cordial sentiments, but getting as close to being able to walk a mile in a person’s shoes without ever putting their boots on.

My note: (which gives you the benefit of being able to speed up your own evolution process)

#5 Experiencing the extraordinary — perhaps you’re able to experience, feel and see what is beyond the ordinary…a sound, a sense, a color not yet coined — dare I say magic?

My note: (makes life WAY more enchanting — especially when you allow yourself to engage with your entire, sensitive, soulful being)

#6 Mental telepathy — this one is interesting and I’m still working this out, but it seems that highly sensitive people may have the ability to sense when someone is going to call them, send them a text message, stop over for a visit, or can even pick up on personal messages offered from others while engaging in other conversations.

My note: (this is DEFINITELY true. Once we stop believing the BS that our sensitivities make us weak, we can truly begin to open ourselves up to their full potential. In order to do this, however, you have to INCREASE your ability to feel. Most empaths spend their time trying to turn it off. Why would you do that when there is so much AWESOMENESS that can be experienced from it?!)

#7 Storytelling — because of your highly sensitive nature, perhaps you are able to elegantly and graciously use descriptive words to narrate and create the most divine of stories — played, written, painted or through movement.

My note: (again, engaging in life. When empaths come out of hiding and allow themselves to be fully present in their vulnerability and extra-keen senses, magic happens!)

#8 Going solo with confidence — you’re able to be alone without feeling lonely. Sometimes your own company is all you need and want and that’s okay and sometimes even preferred.

My note: (to take this one step further, people who are able to be by themselves are often more intelligent, self-reflective, and creative, because they allow themselves time to be an observer — to consider nuance, subtleties, symbolism, and metaphor. This gives them the advantage of self-actualization, which, is the ultimate goal of life, right? Aren’t we all trying to understand who we are and why we’re here? Empaths, if allowed out of their “protection bubble” have the ability to make their life a stunning work of poetic art).

#9 Above average mindfulness — you’re able to move to the other side of the sidewalk so someone can pass. You’re more than willing to make room for a group of people coming onto the bus or you find yourself making eye contact with a by-passer…all in the name of making it easier for everyone — them and you. Often this trait is default and isn’t something you need to ‘activate’.

My note: (and let’s face it, the world needs more of this!)

#10 Easy to cry — showing our emotions in the form of crying can come easier for us sensitive souls, but it’s also a healthy release of constrictive emotions and thought-patterns — a cleansing of our windows to the soul and our lenses out into the world.

My note: (I could go on-and-on about the benefit of tears, but for now I will just say, WORD. Tears are healing, cleansing, and a powerful way to be fully present in the MOMENT. People who spend years in caves meditating could probably reach enlightenment much quicker if they would allow emotions to be as present as the breath, and let tears lead them into the ultimate purity of nirvana).

#11 Work excellent in a team setting — due to our ability to pick-up on how people are feeling, we’re able to respond to the team’s needs to help them work in the most optimal way.

My note: (people just like you more — ha ha)

#12 Hard working — you tend to be a deep thinker and perhaps a little bit of a perfectionist. Highly sensitive people tend to put everything and a little more into tasks at hands especially projects that others will witness and be involved in.

My note: (feeling deeply in-and-of-itself is hard work. Never let yourself feel lazy if you’re a deep feeler — you’re doing the work, honey — believe me!)

#13 Easily moved by artistic expression — and if there’s anything that keeps the world’s artists inspired and creativity in full rebellion is having those who are moved by it — and show it.

My note: (nothing worth creating would be possible without those who can respond, emotionally. When it comes to truly engaging with and enjoying life, logic is incredibly overrated).

I hope this list helped you remember how amazingly badass, powerful, expressive, artistic, wise, and special you are.

Thank you for being on the planet. This world would be a robotic nightmare without you!

Empaths Forgot Their Power

Empaths

Empaths: Sensitive people whose primary mode of communication is vibrational – highly responsive to energy.

Conflict: Most have used this ability to hide or manipulate rather than feel and thrive. We call this “helping others.”

When I first realized there was a name for what I was, I read as much as I could about what it meant, and was immediately discouraged.

The message?

You’re basically the most vulnerable person on the planet. Good luck with that. Don’t forget to “buckle up” with your “shield of protection.”

Great. So I’m sensitive (already been told that my entire life).

But perhaps the most nauseating part of it all was reading the many blog forums and online articles where empaths and Highly Sensitive People (HSP) glorified their terrible boundary issues and blood doll status as if it were a badge of service to the planet.

Ugh.

I can’t say this is true for everyone, or that how I’ve learned to thrive as an empath will work for everyone. All I know is the prescribed classic remedy of “shielding/protecting/coping” didn’t work for me. At all. And in fact, it made things worse.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

I’m no more special than anyone else because I’m sensitive. Nor am I more vulnerable or weak. People develop acute empathic abilities for all sorts of reasons: some are born that way, others learn to read people’s emotions as a means of survival due to abuse. Whatever the reason, being an empath is no more special than being good at playing instruments or sports. It’s just part of the human diversity.

I’m not trying to take away the importance or power of this gift, but I also don’t want to elevate it as a super human ability, and here’s why:

Many empaths have a deep, core sense of unworthiness, and while it is important that we learn to see our value, it is equally important not to believe that being ultra-sensitive makes us more special than others. This only breeds further isolation and elitism, which is counter intuitive, really, because the mere fact that we are extra sensitive to other people’s energy is a reminder that at a fundamental level, we are all one – we’re all connected. Deep healing, then, comes from harmonizing with that energy around us, not creating separation from it.

Second, when empaths set themselves apart from the rest of humanity as the “sensitive” ones of the planet, we typically end-up glorifying co-dependent relationships and unhealthy boundaries because we falsely believe that everyone’s happiness depends on us and we develop a sort of “helper” complex.

Or we take the shielding/protection advice and hide ourselves from the world, believing the only means of survival is to go into the psychic’s version of the “witness protection program.” We disengage from relationships and “normal” life and call it “coping with our sensitivities.”

These are two of the most common pitfalls many unskilled and unhealed empaths stumble into (and I was no exception). The problem is, helping or hiding from the world is not thriving.

Those who take the “helper/light worker” title often end-up further blurring the lines with unhealthy relationships, creating a sort of dependency on other’s needing them and identifying their ability to disempower others (by creating emotional dependency) as their empathic “gift.”

Allowing others to suck your energy dry is NOT what it means to be empathic.

You can’t make your life better (and you certainly can’t get empowered) by trying to make others happy. Making others’ happiness your primarily focus doesn’t make you a hero, it makes you a blood doll.

What to Avoid:

Don’t become an energetic food source for others. Not only is it unhealthy and unsustainable for you, it is the equivalent of energetic suicide. If you make others believe you’re the only one who can make them happy, heal them, or save them, you do them a diabolical disservice: you disempower them.

Hence the drama with empaths and narcissists since the beginning of time.

Reminders:

It is not your job to change the world (or others) and you couldn’t even if you tried.

The only person you can ever truly change is yourself. Self-mastery is the greatest gift you can give to others, because when you do it, the world sees it can be done. You become an inspiration. You make empowerment attainable.

The only reason you would choose to come into this world with highly sensitive vibrational abilities is to learn how to USE them, how to navigate with them, in order to facilitate your own self-evolution. When you evolve, you “upload” (in a manner of speaking) the codes for self-evolution/mastery into the human consciousness grid. When others see it can be done, they have more belief that they too, can have self-mastery. Running around trying to fix the world will only give you more people to fix (and will drain you of your power in the process).

The world doesn’t need to be fixed. This reality works exactly as it was created to. It gives us what we put out. It perfectly reflects “us” back to us. This is why it is so useful for our self-evolution. And this is why self-mastery is so crucial. The only way we will ever truly have enough power in the world to make a difference is through mastering our own lives, first.

This is not to say that loving others is not important. No doubt the planet could use more love. But altruism isn’t the same as dependency. In order for people to learn, they have to be free to walk their path. God loves us enough to give us that freedom, and it’s crucial we give it to others. When we do help, it should be because it feels good to do so, not because we need to be needed or because we feel obligated to do so. Even when Jesus healed he said “Your faith healed you.” The emphasis was always empowerment.

“Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime.”

The Problem:

We simply got lost. We forgot our true purpose is inner mastery.

Most of us focus our attention on the external world, feel too much, shut down, and that’s the end of it.

We tune-out how WE feel and make other people’s emotions our primary focus because we think that will make us feel better. Feeling other’s emotions and trying to ‘fix’ them seems much easier, because it’s less threatening. Our own emotions, quite frankly, scare the shit out of us.

Why? Because we’ve been told our entire lives that to feel too much is to be weak. And most of us have untold amounts of heartache, pain, and even abuse we’ve never looked at. Our sensitivities make us feel too vulnerable.

The problem is, focusing on others doesn’t actually make us feel better. Sure, it distracts us, but it doesn’t set us free. It doesn’t empower us, and it certainly doesn’t empower anyone else.

At best it gives us a temporary sense of worthiness by being “needed” or loved for what we can do for them – at worst it fuels co-dependent relationships that bleed us of our power. We’re left with nothing but emptiness. And that emptiness is too unbearable to feel, so we bury it, along with every other emotion that would indicate we are OFF COURSE, and go back to allowing others to feed on us. Being an energetic food source gives us a feeling of worth and purpose – for a moment, anyway – an empath’s equivalent to a drug fix.

After the effects of the ‘fix’ wears off, we feel weak and lonely. We may have a lot of “close friends” but we feel like they don’t know us at all – not our true selves anyway, because how could they? We’ve buried our true selves along with all of our emotions. We fixate on the external world and expend our energy to its never-ending need, giving what little power we have to a cycle that can NEVER give back to us. It’s unsustainable, and it’s energetically barbaric.

So what’s the solution?

Here’s what I’ve learned:

FEEL. FEEL. And FEEL!

The biggest mistake empaths make is to shut off their emotions.

But the ability to feel deeply IS our power. It is the power of humanity as a whole. When you allow yourself to feel the emotional space WITHIN and communicate back to the world with your strong, finely tuned, highly sensitive capabilities, you create a sort of empathic dialogue with the energy around you and begin to learn what it means to create your own reality (or really, just line-up with a reality that is best suited for your growth and evolution). When you create a harmonic internal realm, the external begins to harmonize around you. That is how you bring more peace and love to the world. This is true compassion. It starts within.

This is a vibrational Universe, after all, and emotions are the strongest vibrational indicators we’ve got at our disposal. When you look at it his way, emotions, and the ability to feel deeply, becomes our super power.

Don’t believe feeling deeply makes you weak. Vibrational sensitivity gives you the power to move anywhere on the grid you wish. It’s not a matter of brute strength and it certainly has nothing to do with “logic” – it is vibrational intelligence.

This is as simple as asking yourself (in any given moment) what feels good and what doesn’t. Then moving in the direction that feels most empowering. But you will never know what that is unless you TUNE-IN!

So how do you tune-in?

GO WITHIN.

Go within. Allow yourself to FEEL where you are, without judgement or identification. Emotions are not YOU — they are simply your indicators. They help you know where you’re at so you can get to where you want to be.

Give yourself the sustaining, nurturing power of your own presence. Love yourself enough to be free from the emptiness of co-dependency.

Don’t allow the world to make you feel your emotional capacity is a weakness. Don’t believe the lie that being empathic is an acute form of vulnerability. And NEVER shut your heart down.

Feel.

Emotions are your greatest tool.

Use them.

Click here for online classes on empowering empaths.

What Are Emotions?

Empaths

Emotions are power.

I’ve always known this, but the more inner child/shadow work I do, the more I realize the brilliance of their function.To understand what an emotion is, it’s important to be still and allow yourself to empath the nuance and subtly of what the moment FEELS like. When I do this, even if I’m sad or angry, I realize the feelings themselves are not painful — they are beautiful, enchanted movements of energy that act more like paint than solidified, unmovable road blocks.

Emotions create our auric landscape — the screen around us by which we allow our physical bodies to either feel safe and soothed, or nervous and inflamed (which is what it looks like in the body when we resist where we are and ignore, bypass, or judge our emotions).

Tuning-in to the emotional body, for me, feels like a beautiful underwater enchantment. The waves of emotional vibration are completely fluid, which means if we FLOW with the vibrations, we can move through them with ease and grace. This is part of opening the heart chakra and learning self-trust. It’s an aspect of emotional mastery. It’s our power.

What does it feel like when you tune-in to your emotional body?

If you were to simply feel, without judging any emotion that may arise, what kind of picture would your emotions paint around you? Tuning-in to the emotional body is one of the fastest ways to tune-in to your power. It’s an excellent way to get an idea of how energy is moving around you and what you are in the process of creating and attracting into your experience.

But remember: emotions are not YOU. They are simply vibrational indicators. Emotions make the moment what it is, helping you know where you are so you can flow to where you want to be. No emotion is wrong. You don’t have to feel happy all the time. It’s not only unrealistic but it’s unhealthy. Emotions helps us flow through dense realities and contrast, and are there for us to move energy in-and-out of our bodies. It’s difficult to shift from feeling anger to joy, but possible to flow from anger to relief if we allow our emotions to move naturally and don’t stop their flow with unnecessary judgement.

Emotions are magic like that. Always moving, if we allow them to.The problem is, we get addicted to certain emotions and demonize others. This will never work if we want to flow in a balanced/harmonized way with this life experience.

Every emotion is valid. We don’t have to base our actions solely on feeling, but we can allow ourselves to move THROUGH emotion by first accepting all of them as equally beneficial for our journey and growth. Emotions are here to teach, not control. And it’s important to release resistance to them in order to receive the power of their function.

Lately I’ve had a lot of questions about this topic. The New Age movement, with all it’s focus on positivity, has left many in a chronic state of spiritual bypass, and it’s starting to catch-up with us. Denying how you feel will never lead to true peace because peace implies authenticity.

Remember: it’s okay to feel. Emotions are our vibrational language and suppressing or denying them only limits our ability to communicate.

Let it flow.

Hope you are all having a fantastic Sunday!

Much love!

Amanda

PS. I go into a lot of detail about emotions (and how they work) in my “Creating with Emotions online class.” It’s a good place to start if you’re one of those readers who wants to go deeper.

What I Know For Sure

Empaths

Oprah has a section in her magazine called “What I know for sure” (something like that). Every month she reflects on her most recent life lessons and narrows it down to what she can say she knows “for sure.” And it got me thinking; what do I *know* for sure? Believe it or not, it’s a much harder question than I anticipated – especially when I’m in such an intense process of undoing, unlearning, and unknowing.

Here’s what I’ve boiled it down to:

I know that self-love is not just about accepting our “flaws” or “humanity” – it’s also about acknowledging and allowing our power – our Being – to simply BE. In fact, my most “god-like” moments have little to do with altruism or grand demonstrations of love. Rather, the moments I feel the most content and in love with life is when I’m allowing what I feel inside to be what I express on the outside – and it changes all the time! Being authentic – allowing exactly what I am to matter – to be, and to show. The fact that these moments are standing out with such profound clarity is a deep indication of how much of my life I’ve spent being inauthentic, for the motivation of being more loved, more accepted, more likeable.

What a prison.

The truth is, I don’t know. I feel unsure. I feel elated. I feel powerful. I feel beautiful. I feel invincible. I feel vulnerable. I feel like I DO know. And rather than qualifying these passing feelings to definition, I’m simply allowing myself to be a contradiction. I find the more I embrace my inner paradox, the less ambiguous I become.

When I really think about it, the biggest lie I use to tell was how insecure or weak I felt. I told that lie a lot – because I thought it made me more likable. Somewhere along my journey I got the message that to be confident about myself was prideful. Or to do/write/be where I authentically resonated was unacceptable, intolerable, or unpalatable. In the confusion of trying to be acceptable, I forgot what it meant to be. That’s when I started to lie. And it seemed to work. People seemed to enjoy or feel disarmed by my self-depreciating tendencies, to the extent that I made it a huge part of my personality.. But it never really felt good to me. And what I’m learning is, it wasn’t fair to my relationships. Living a lie may feel more polite, but on an energetic level, it’s barbaric.

So here’s what I know for sure: I don’t want to lie anymore.

I’ve stopped pretending to be anything other than what I am. Sometimes I feel small and insignificant, but mostly, when I’m really honest, I feel/see how immense and powerful I am. That I can be significant and insignificant simultaneously is awe-inspiring. And what’s most surprising to discover is, I really like myself. I’ve spent so much time believing to hate myself was the more righteous thing to do, that I never realized I was fighting against my most basic nature, which is love. I actually love myself.

I like that I’m a walking paradox. I like that I’ve tried and failed a million times. I like that I can throw a fit when things aren’t going well because I know deep down life is MEANT to be lived awake and aware. I like that I allow my vulnerability to be seen and still take care to give my heart what it needs. But most of all, I like that I’m human. People typically associate “humanness” with being weak or flawed, but I see it as the most badass modality for expressing many truths, and failing all of them simultaneously. How ingenious of us! This experiment is working well.

So here’s to being human, to not knowing (and sometimes not even caring) what “the truth” is. I just know that I Am. And that’s enough.

Go Home, Get Triggered, Write a Poem.

Creative Writing, Empaths, healing

Yes. That’s what happens when I go home, I get triggered.

I think everyone can relate — especially if you’re an empath or highly sensitive. “Home” is like walking into the middle of a landmine. No bueno.

I knew when I planned this trip it was going to be a test. A test of how well I can remember who I am.

Before going I had more than one dream of floating on top of Utah lake, one of the main landmarks of Utah county. Beautiful to behold from a distance, but a cesspool of mercury laden fish and dead bodies — literally.

At the boat dock, warning signs assault any lingering serenity, advising would-be fishers not to eat more than a half a pound of fish from the lake in a YEAR.

Delish.

In my dreams, Utah lake is like the consciousness of the State — sparkling from the outside, full of poison within. And I know I come from here. It is apart of me.

A hard dream to swallow.

I must make friends with this place. Love it, like the shadowy places inside me– for they know not what they do.

Sometimes it works. Glorious moments occur where I shift into a new reality, and all is well. Utah is the home I always wanted — welcoming me with her majestic mountains. Smiling on me with her glorious sun.

But bliss is short lived and I wake to see the inversion settling in, filling my lungs with death.

Maybe it’s meant to always be a reminder of the contrast I come from — the stark memories of the life I don’t prefer, so I can go off into the horizon with renewed desire to create something new.

For some reason this trip home was the hardest one so far, and yet, the most freeing.

This poem emerged as an after thought. I highly recommend creating from melancholy — it leaves quite a ghostly whisper:

Home

At home her tall steeples frown down on me
as I reach for the sky where her finger points.
Her mountains shield fears
behind walls of trapped tears,
her air turns my lungs black.

A barren land – my milk-less mother
too weak to eat the metal fish in her pond.
With naked eyes I remove her blindfold.
Where Nothing Is
Everything is Hidden.

You Didn’t Fail, You Expanded

Empaths, Spirituality

There really is an art to surrender.

Fighting against every emotion, being “on top” on my vibration, trying to be intentional and conscious about every little thing I do — well — it can sometimes take the joy out of LIVING. Didn’t we come here to be HUMAN? Why would we leave our place of Oneness — our knowing of All Things, to come into a human experience and deny ourselves the experience/blessing of being a singular person with an ego and identity and flaws? We will never learn real love by having an attitude of intolerance towards our learning process.

Living on purpose and with awareness is important (of course) but I feel so many of us feel like if we know we create our reality and anything exists in our experience that does not feel like BLISS, we somehow failed as creators. But we would never be able to create anything at all if we didn’t first experience creating what we don’t want.

We came here to fail and succeed, because in this reality, you can’t have one without the other — it’s the nature (and brilliance) of a dualistic world. The trick is to not see anything you do as a failure, but simply as an experience that teaches us all more about ourselves, and helps us further our expansion. It is only our judgement/beliefs about any experience or situation that gives it a negative or positive feeling — not the experience itself. Drop the judgment.

I am beginning to understand that the key to happiness in this life is not being perfectly in alignment all of the time (or even 90% or 70% of the time), but to love and embrace every experience/emotion/creation along the way. LOVE THE PROCESS. LOVE THE JOURNEY. SURRENDER TO LIFE. Give yourself grace. Surrender to the experience (which means failing, messing up, trying too hard, feeling small and insignificant — all of it). You came here to give yourself the perspective of separation just as much as you wanted to understand more fully what Oneness is. We wanted to learn to appreciate all of what we are — not just the aspects that feel acceptable.

So if you are feeling like you failed, you’re too weak, or you just can’t get it right — let yourself off the hook. You are PERFECTLY where you are, and that is always enough. Accept and surrender, and the flow of life will take you to your next level of expansion.

Sending appreciation for all of you today! Thank you for being courageous enough to be HUMAN! What miracles we are!

PS. This interview with intuitive empath Sonia Choquette SO resonated with me because she offers a loving voice to the benefit of failure and points out how we often bypass our humanity (especially in the spiritual community) because we feel we must be perfect. So real and authentic!

The Journey Home: How Pain Can Lead to Power

Empaths

Sometimes I forget I matter.

I forget my emotions are my friends (not my enemies).

I forget contrast is here to serve me (not master me).

I forget I am worthy of love.

Coming “home” is where I typically pick up all of my old insecurities:

I’m not good enough, it would seem. I’m unworthy of truly being free.

My first response to is beat myself up. WHY?! Why in the name of all that is holy would I choose to come back to the place I feel the worst about myself? Haven’t I learned my lesson? Why would I do this to my emotional body?!

If I follow that line of thought, the only conclusion I come to is that I am powerless over my emotions and I will always be stuck here – rooted in trauma and fear.

But I know being “stuck” is impossible in a world of constant growth and expansion.

So I press on, guiding my focus toward a stream of thought that feels better to think.

Although feeling powerless shifts responsibility away for a bit (how I feel is caused by THIS PLACE – not me), the truth is, I know better. I know the feelings come from within. I know my thoughts are the ones in control here, not this geographic location. “Home” is a hologram built on my experiences and beliefs.

And I begin to regain power.

Oh yes. That’s right. I get to choose what to think about – where to direct my focus. What do I want to think? What will feel better than these thoughts of powerlessness?

I need to know I have my best interest at heart. I have to know God loves me enough not to abandon me in these feelings of unworthiness. I want to remember the way the Universe allows me to continually revisit deep places of conflict to give me the opportunity to heal further, to accept, love, and understand myself with more clarity. I want to develop more compassion and an unconditional presence to my emotions.

Yes. That’s it. That’s why I’m here. I needed to show up for myself – especially in these places that feel the most unacceptable.

Okay. These thoughts feel better. I feel my vibration shift. I feel more empowered. I feel more taken care of. I feel more seen and heard and loved.

Maybe I’m not abandoned.

So here I am – the genesis of my trauma. I loved myself enough to come back here, right? What do I want out of this experience? What do I need? How do I want to feel?

Perhaps I simply need to be reminded I am not alone. I Am here. God is here. Purpose is here, in this place. This is a loving place to be – a loving thing to do to myself. I need this reminder. I need to know this part of me matters.

I chose to come “home” because I wanted to show myself I care enough to strengthen the places within me that need the most unconditional love.

I chose to revisit old wounds because they asked me to bear witness to their presence – they begged not to be abandoned in the past. And I love myself enough to show up.

I am thankful I have the courage to come home. I need this part of myself for the journey.

Oh yes. I remember now. I almost forgot about the journey – the moments of love and soothing presence offered along the way. The peace found in the storms – the halleluiah chorus along the way reminding me why I chose to come into this life in the first place. This knowing is the reason – this space between pain and beauty – the place of surrender and acceptance of all things, especially the hurt.

Now I can say I am truly thankful (and mean it) for this spot on the earth called “home.” I have not failed here – this is where I had my greatest success. Here I chose to live and hurt – to love and lose and bleed and desire. This is the place I am continually led to for renewal of hope. And God meets me here, in my “weakness.” This place is where I find my greatest strength.

Here I am free.

Creating with Emotions Online Class

Empaths, featured, Features, Online Classes, Online Classes/Retreats, Online Courses

Emotions vibrate faster than thoughts. They are powerful conduits for creating reality and our life experiences. Learning to use the power of emotions to our benefit is a crucial step to thriving (especially as an empath).

If you’ve taken “Empowering Empathic Abilities” and “Healing and Empowering the Emotional Body” online classes, Creating with Emotions offers practices for the next step with our emotions once we’ve learned to master them.

In this class we will focus on:

*How emotions fuel vibrations (and our point of attraction)

*The role of emotions in creating our reality

*The importance of trust, healing, and shadow work in the process of consciously creating

*Practices that help to remove common blocks in our creation process

*The role of DESIRE in creation

*The power of NOW: How to embrace the moment and use it to its fullest potential

Price $33

I look forward to connecting again!

Creating with Emotions Online Class $33

Monday’s Magic: Soothing the Emotional Body

Aromatherapy, Empaths, The Heart Chakra, The Throat Chakra

A Daily Affirmation for Self-Soothing

I Am – Letting go of my self-concept

Today I see and validate that I Am – and that is more than enough.

I allow my emotions to flow like a powerful river and I thank them for being my allies in this experience in the physical.

I Am a powerful creator and I know my thoughts and emotions are creating the reality I see before me

Therefore I direct my focus inward – to the causal plane.

I embrace the tremendous power of the NOW and choose to bring 100% of my focus into the present moment.

In this moment I embrace and accept all that I feel, and I choose to direct my focus in flow of relief/validation/and self-love – in a way that gives to my emotional body a deep soothing comfort.

I acknowledge that my emotions are my superpower, and I choose to listen to their wise counsel, always bringing in the Wisdom of my Higher Self to help decide the best course of action for my moment.

This moment is eternal as I am eternal. There are no limitations and no time rush. I have time to feel how I feel and give myself what I need. There is space for me to bask in the delicious and soothing energy of self-care.

I know that through this self-care, I will be more whole, more powerful, more creative, more authentic, more compassionate, and a wiser human.

By allowing myself to FEEL I am causing the expansion of the entire Universe – letting All that *is* be apart of my unique perspective.

It is an honor to be in this human body and feel my way through this existence. I am eternally grateful for this power that has been bestowed on me in this moment, and I choose to use it to the fullest potential of each and every *now* the Universe offers me.

I trust the Love of the Existence and receive in it the deepest parts of my soul, in all the places that have lost hope or feel fear. I allow unconditional LOVE to heal all of me, to be present with me in every moment with every emotion.

I will never abandonment myself again, but will do my best to show up and be present to my emotions, trusting in the wisdom of the Universe to guide me into Joy.

I give myself grace. I forgive everyone, everywhere, in all timelines, especially myself.

I receive the moment and all that it has to offer. I am free.

Monday’s Magic: The Power of Receiving Self-Care

Empaths, The Heart Chakra, The Throat Chakra

For the past 3 months I’ve been contemplating the energies of giving and receiving. Not just because these are the energies of the sacral chakra (one of the most traumatized and blocked chakras for most people in our earth journey) but because really, if you pay attention, their essence is identical. Giving and receiving are really just different sides of the same coin — you can’t have one without the other. If we don’t allow ourselves to receive, we have nothing to give, and if we don’t give, we don’t have room to receive. It moves. The painful part of either side is when we stop the flow.

The Universe has been challenging me to receive more. Receive self-love, self-care, wisdom, guidance, and understanding of the opposites in my life (particularly the opposites that have brought the most pain).

Loosing my mother was one of them — probably the most painful trauma of my life. And it wasn’t just her death — it was all the trauma surrounding her death: watching cancer eat her alive, being left in the dark about what was *really* going on (I was only 12), having to move in with my dad (whom I didn’t really know), and worst of all, being molested by a family friend while this was all happening.

I’ve spent over 8 years in therapy just trying to process that trauma — which felt like one dramatic kick from the Universe all at once — and all aimed at my lower chakras (my ability to survive in this world).

Recently, my aunt died. She was my mom’s sister and the last of my mom’s entire family. She’s also basically filled the role of my mom since she my mother died, and while she never tried to replace her, she was there. She existed.

I thought I was prepared for her death. She was sick and we knew it was coming for awhile — but when it happened it felt like a finality I was not expecting. My Uncle (her brother) died a week before her, and that was it. All my mom’s family gone. It was not just an end to my aunt’s life, but it felt like an ending to everything about my mother.

All the houses we lived in when she was alive are torn down. Even the place she worked for 15 years is gone. It feels like the memory of her has been wiped off the face of the earth, and my aunt’s death was the final nail in the coffin.

And I was heart broken.

When my mom died I wasn’t allowed to grieve. I didn’t know how, and neither did anyone around me. All my siblings were in too much shock — too much grief. And my father’s way of coping was to act like nothing happened. He took me and my sister to a movie on the day of her death (Aladin), and while I know his heart was to get our minds off things, it felt to me like he was saying, “It’s just an ordinary day. We have to move on and keep living — there is no time for your feelings.” Something in me died that day.

On the day my aunt died a similar situation happened — a family baby shower was the same day, and due to certain circumstances the decision was made by family members to still have the shower. And while it was nobody’s fault and just the way the cards were dealt, I felt like, once again, the world around me was saying “you don’t get to grieve. just put on a smile and act like nothing happened.”

I couldn’t do it. Something within me rose up like a red hot flame — all the anger I have ever felt in my life — all the injustice of a world that doesn’t seem to leave any room for grief — every thing inside of me refused to let it happen again — refused to not allow the grief to matter. Everything in me was screaming inside: “NO! I GET TO GRIEVE! HOW I FEEL MATTERS…I REFUSE TO ABANDON MYSELF AGAIN!” And I didn’t go. I couldn’t go. I was in too much of an emotional trigger and the last thing I wanted to do was go to a baby shower with 30 people I didn’t know and pretend to be happy.

Inevitably people’s feelings got hurt. But I was past the point of no return. I was in too much of my own trigger/pain to care. I still don’t have the ability to put any energy toward that — though I logically care about people’s feelings, I have NO emotional validation to give. And to be honest, I’m proud of myself. I feel that if I would have swallowed my feelings and went, I would have re-triggered one of the most painful experiences in my life — I would have abandoned my emotions and given-in to the external world, agreeing with the message that how I feel doesn’t matter.

Something has shifted in me since I made that decision. Not only did I show up for myself and give myself what I needed, I have fiercely protected and defended it — I have refused on EVERY level to feel guilty about my decision. I simply won’t do it. Guilt, after all, is the emotion that blocks the sacral chakra — affecting our ability to give and receive. I knew that if I allowed guilt to be apart of my experience, I would not be able to receive the healing needed.

And somewhere in that red hot flame of self-protection, I’ve learned how much the Universe loves me. I decided to take my own advice and ask myself every day — every 5 minutes, really, how I feel and what I need. And the answer has been space. So I’ve given it to myself. I’ve spent nearly 3 weeks in almost total isolation (minus the occasional talk with a friend or family member).

In this time, I have received more healing, more love, more understanding, more comfort, and more inner-strength than I EVER have in my entire life. And although from the outside it may seem like I’m avoiding people, not being there for others who are grieving, what I’m really doing is embracing all the inner needs and depths of my trauma I have avoided up to this point (so that I will have something to give when the time is right). I am re-establishing trust with myself and beginning to really believe it when I say “I will never abandon you again.”

Thank God for the ability to receive. Thank God for self-care and self love. These past 3 weeks have restored me to a new level of inner-peace and strength — and it has given me the time and focus to heal a deeply buried wound.

So this must be what the tipping point feels like. I am here, where I feel like I can come out of my cocoon and give back — move all the energy I have received. I have drank deeply from the nourishment of God’s peace and comfort. And I’ve done so without guilt. That’s the best part of receiving — when we can do so FREELY.

It’s amazing, really, the way this hologram gives us continuous opportunities to heal old wounds by having similar circumstances occur again and again until we are finally able to receive the healing. But we can only receive healing by giving ourselves permission to do so — permission to matter.

I feel a new peace. My mother feels closer than ever — because I’ve finally allowed myself to receive her. I received her presence these past three weeks, and I’ve said goodbye to my aunt, more thankful than ever for what she was to me while she was here.

Thanks for loving and supporting me right where I am. Thanks for not putting me on pedestal and making me have to be anything I am not. And thank you for being honestly where YOU are. We all are where we are, and that is perfection.

This New Year, commit to giving yourself the gift of self-love. Receive ALL the Universe has for you in THIS moment, so you have something truly of substance to give back. Let 2015 be a year of truly giving and receiving all the gifts of Source.

Have a magical Monday!

The Universe Speaks to YOU: Listen

Empaths

As I’ve learned to tune-in and pay attention to the more subtle energies around and within me, I’m experiencing an entire new world of messages from the Universe.

We’ve been trained since infancy on what to pay attention to in this world (and what to ignore). Because of this, we miss a lot.

Lately, I’ve been paying attention – close attention to all the energy around me. I look at things longer than usual and rather than scan for the most “relevant” and cognitive information (like I was trained to do), I now look for the more subtle – I pay attention to how something makes me feel and follow the stream of vibrations that feel the best in those moments. This never fails to lead me into unexpected epiphanies or direct downloads from my Higher Self.

I’m getting much better at seeing signs I’d usually miss – or am I creating them? I don’t really know. But I am noticing that the Universe (God) is communicating to me ALL THE TIME through the world around me – often in the most unexpected ways.

Here are three recent messages that seemed to come out of nowhere:

While taking a shower I noticed (for the FIRST time) a tag on a towel I’ve used at least 100 times “Find Inspiration in Your World” — this just happened to occur at the moment I was asking the Universe to help me find a way to express my creativity more.

Later, the same day, while sitting on the couch (in a spot I have sat in at least a dozen times) I felt my inner-self still, the way I feel just before hearing the voice of God and I knew to pay attention. Only seconds before I had a fleeting thought run through my head “maybe I don’t really have much to offer the world…” but when the stillness came, I knew to pay attention. My eyes just happened to look down and I saw on the side of the computer (of all places) this sticker (which “apparently” has been there all along – though I’d never seen it – nor had my sister who bought the computer and set it up: “Beautiful. Inside and Out.” Since when has HP put that message on the side of their computers?! I knew it was the Universe, once more, speaking to me, in the most unexpected ways.

Just before going to bed the same day, I was watering the Christmas tree and noticed an ornament that I had never seen before. It was a golden, sparkling hummingbird, and I knew right away it was another message from Spirit (and the meaning of this one was clear, as hummingbirds represent being more present in the moment, independence, playfulness, and enjoyment of life).

The message was now complete:

“Find inspiration in the world. Know you are beautiful inside and out. Be present in the moment, play, and enjoy your life. This is how you will express who you are to the world.”

I love the way the Universe speaks.

We know this Universe is one of vibrations. Anything you feel at any given moment WILL be reflected in a physical way through this hologram. The truth is, we could get any message we want to receive from the Universe, but why not ask/feel for the message that puts you into the greatest alignment with your Higher Self? And when the messages you receive don’t feel so good, remember it is only a reflection of an internal vibration. You’re not failing, you’re feeling. This is your learning tool. Use it wisely.

Because of immense expansion this “Universal decoding” has given to my intuitive abilities, I decided to do a section on hearing and de-coding messages from the Universe in my Healing and Empowering the Emotional Body class. I think it’s one of the most fun aspects of being on this planet!

Happy Sunday!

Happy Winter Solstice: Bring Back the Treasures of Darkness!

Empaths, winter solstice

Can you feel it? We’re Shifting in life-altering ways. As we’ve put our focus on empowering ourselves/taking back our energy/untangling our thoughts and emotions from other people and giving ourselves what we need to be healthy and thrive, a certain inner clarity is arising. The Universal OM is emerging from our inner-most places of darkness.

In my experience, it feels like my inner Shaman is unusually active and helping me go through some of the deepest realms of my subconscious fears. These Shamanic journeys into my own inner realms have also shown me the vibrational boarders of many of my defense mechanisms (after all, we have come to realize that much of our “empathic ability” developed as a form of survival in this world). In other words, I’ve been exploring/healing/and integrating trigger points on my emotional body, and to be honest, there have been moments where it is scary as f**k!

BUT, through all of this, I am finding my inner-strength — the Goddess — the Mother and protector of the sacred realms of emotions, the Wise Crone, the Hag — all the treasures of my inner-world (the Underworld) and all the most valuable secrets of femininity. I can honestly say I am going through a level of empowerment that I have NEVER felt in this lifetime. Ever. It is amazing and terrifying all at the same time. The Universe is asking me to redefine all of my relationships, to evaluate my sense of worth, and to “unplug” as much as humanly possible from diving into other people’s emotional bodies. It is only in THIS way that I am TRULY seeing who I am, what I *really* feel, and what I truly need.

I am strengthening my vibrational boarders — meaning ANY vibrational resonances that is close/similar to past relational tendencies I am healing, clearing, shifting out of (and sometimes, even having to lay the smack down with).

During one mediation I saw a black leopard come out of me — a power animal aspect that I have LONG suppressed (and she’s SO badass — with a type of strength and sense of personal boundaries that I was unable to access until now). When she came out, she stretched (the way cats do) and then started “patrolling” my vibrational boarders. A few times old vibrations (tendencies/relational stuff) have come-up — and she just knocks them out — the way a cat will bat things out of their way. She gracefully and unapologetically says “No. You don’t belong here.” I have felt so empowered by her presence — so inspired by her grace and form.

This is what we’re doing. We’re waking up. We’re connecting to our inner-strength (and our MAGIC). We’re healing. And we’re changing — for the better. For the SHIFT.

I’ll be talking a lot more about vibrational boarders in my Healing and Empowering the Emotional Body” class, and sharing how I have accessed my inner Shaman, working with power animals to go into our “otherworlds,” and empowering ourselves through our OWN emotional bodies (taking our focus back). I feel this is THE MOST IMPORTANT work I’ve done to date in my life and I’m curious to hear how it’s going for all of you, too.

I’ll do a video on this in the next day or so. In the meantime I just wanted to share a bit about my travels through my inner-dimensions — and I’m bringing back with me all the treasures of darkness.

Happy Solstice!